Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
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