you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
Wearing rip off pants to a booty call last night was one of my most brilliant ideas ever.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
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