I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I'm hoping they send me home from work drunk.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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