ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
