I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
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