he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Randomize
