Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Dude you spent 20 minutes on the phone with dominos answering machine trying to order a pizza
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
