is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
