just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
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