Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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