she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
