In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
It's been a year of occasional hook ups....this was bound to happen sometime even with your jank ovary schedule.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Randomize
