If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
Randomize
