i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
THERE WAS A HANDPRINT OF BLOOD ON HIS SHOULDER
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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