Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Randomize