He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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