I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
