I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I had one beer! ONE BEER! They took shots in mourning of my tolerance last night. My ability to drink is a joke.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Randomize
