if you like me you must not know who I am
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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