Church boner. Awkwardddd
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
IM SO HIGH RIGHT NOW, IM WHAT ROCKET MAN WANTED TO BE WHEN HE GREW UP. ELTON JOHN CAN BLOW ME.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
Randomize
