I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
Randomize