Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
Here's an idea...how about I take shots by myself and drunk dial you around noon?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
