I just ate 10 fun sized 3 musakteers.. I'm pretty sure I'm about to start my period.
Talk to you next week
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
I want you to tape your fingers together and give me a lobster claw hand job.
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
Randomize
