sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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