I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
