dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
