She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
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