It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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