can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
