Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
you had me at cake vodka
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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