I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
