you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
