Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I just baby talked my cat. While getting ready for bed... Before 10 on a Friday. I'm officially a cat lady.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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