Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
