i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
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