do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I woke up this morning and the search history on my phone says: "What is this castle in front of my house?"
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Randomize
