She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
