you win again, gameday.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
THE SUPER HOT BARTENDER WHO LOOKS LIKE RYAN GOSLING JUST WALKED IN. BUT HE DOESNT EVEN WALK HE GLIDES. LIKE AN ANGEL.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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