I swear to god Kristen, if this "cute" guy you are trying to hook up with's friend asks me if we can role play, and I play his mother one more time, Im leaving. You have 3 minutes to save me or I am out.
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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