at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I still have that dildo-suction bruise on my forehead and this sweater STILL smells like my Christmas Eve vomit.
Randomize
