He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
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