He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Randomize
