I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I mean that was the nicest way to be dumped by some one I wasn't dating.
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
