I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
3 2 1 whiskey
The Vicodin is in the strawberries.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I need to align my fucking chakras
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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