is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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