my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Your drunken mistake is coming over to see if she wants to buy any of our furniture. I know youre desperate, but try not to fuck her, without a condom, for a fourth time, while shes there.
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I have already put on my inside pants.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Randomize
