You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
Her 4ft mother helped 5ft10 passed out me from the car to my girlfriend's bed at 1am...with whopper in hand
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Randomize
