He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
Meeting relatives from another state drenched in tequila and smelling of weed. I'm gonna kill you for soaking the only bra I brought in Jose Cuervo Gold.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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