I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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