I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Remember when we saw my neighbor taking dick pics of himself? He's back at it!
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
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