The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Well, my nose won't stop bleeding from really bad cocaine and my purse is full of plastic gold coins. Also, someone saved in my phone as "tyrannosaurus sex" won't quit texting me. Savannah won. Let's put it that way.
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
