I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
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