Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
